My Dream Last Night..

I had a dream that I was with Saryn and Brooklyn was her best friend. I never met Saryn. I only dreamed out them because I was looking at their pictures on Facebook. I went to Leland and my Mom abandoned me and on the way we saw Sean and he saw us..needless to say, ha I said something about him like "ew" then Saryn and I were chillling and she kept calling Brooklyn and I kept pretending to be her..and we were in the office which was green paying for Homecoming tickets in advance without dates..and my mom kicked her and over and over. Then Saryn said we should hang out more. Weird..and she kept talking about her bro Alex.

Besides dreams lately, I've been feeling down because of Valentines Day..it really hurts me. The one thing I want most likely can't be mine, but as a good friend once told me, the Laws of attraction. I wish Saturday would be nice. .I already feel the connect being lost. I really don't want it to end up this way. NO one asks me to be their girl friend, no one holds my hands, no one holds me, no one kisses me..everyone says I'm pretty and I'll find a boyfriend. One of my best friends has been saying this for years..has she ever seen me with anyone who doesn't break my heart? She lives in a small town on the outskirts of my city, she doesn't get how hard it is for us city girls. We deal with grit and grime and we know how to deal with it. I've had enough. All I wish for, for Valentines day was someone..to maybe want to do something with me. The only thing standing between me and having what I want is NOTHING. Even L has a boyfriend..he's nasty (I heard his ex liked it up the butt). I wish I was in her shoes..she's perfect. Anyways, I'm preparing for another heartbreak day.